The Four Agreements
A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
(from M. Ruiz, The Four Agreements)
The Four Agreements are tools to help us in the process of personal transformation. This transformation requires an inventory of our beliefs, which are based on agreements we have made with life. We can transform our beliefs and break our old, self-limiting agreements by practicing the Four Agreements.
THE FOUR AGREEMENTS ARE:
Be Impeccable With Your Word
Say only what you mean. The word is the most powerful tool we have as humans. Depending upon how it is used, the word can help us to become free or to enslave us. By practicing impeccability we can clear up communication problems, heal relationships, and create enough personal power to break our old limiting agreements.
Don’t Take Things Personally
Each of us lives in our own personal dream, and what we say, what we do, and the opinions we give come from the agreements that we have in our own minds – they have nothing to do with anyone else. By the same token, others’ opinions have nothing to do with us, so there is nothing to take personally. When we make the assumption that whatever happens is because of us, we continue to hurt each other and brood about what we call injustice. A huge amount of freedom is gained when we take nothing personally.
Don’t Make Assumptions
We make assumptions when we think we know what others mean, or when we think they know what we mean. The problem with making all those assumptions is that we believe them as the truth, and we blame others for the assumptions that we make. We must have the courage to ask what another means, and the courage to say what we really mean. The day we stop making assumptions, we communicate cleanly and clearly, free of emotional poison.
Always Do Your Best
This agreement makes the other three possible. When we simply do our best — not more and not less — we avoid self-condemnation and we have no regrets. Although our best is always changing, we continually strive to do our best.